My Love Story ~ Part Fourteen

I can't believe I've dragged this story out for fourteen chapters, or posts, or whatever you want to call it. I apologize from the depths of my being if this has in any way discouraged you, bored you to tears, or disgusted you in general. Believe me, I understand those emotions, and I sincerely seek forgiveness. Thank you.
If you, however, do not understand what I am talking about, then click here to find out what you haven't been missing.
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I had ended my "relationship" with Terry. It was over. I enjoyed being pursued, for the first time in my life, and I enjoyed the distraction from the pain of ending things with Mike. BUT...I couldn't seriously consider marrying this man! I had spent my entire life of nineteen years in either Hot Springs or Benton, Arkansas, which happened to be only 20 minutes from Little Rock! I was a city girl in every sense of the word! He was raised in the country. He was a preacher's kid, my parents' both worked in the secular world. He hunted deer, and ate them. He fished, and ate them, too. He loved four-wheel-dive vehicles, guns, and boats. I knew nothing about deer, fish, trucks, guns or boats. I only knew about malls, subdivisions - like the one I grew up in- and going to beauty salons. (Not that it did much good, but I always felt better for trying.) For fun, I would go with my Mom on Saturdays to the school where she taught and helped her decorate her bulletin boards. We would eat hamburgers right in her classroom!! (I know! Can you think of anything more fun?) When she became a principal, I would type things for her and roam the halls. It was a very wild life! I realized one night, as I was second guessing my decision, that I had, in fact, done the right thing.I knew opposites attracted, but we were just too opposite! As I looked at him in his black wranglers and his very brightly colored western shirt, all doubt vanished from my mind. I just wasn't a western girl. His Mom told me that he'd always wanted a girl with a pickup truck and a bass boat. That wasn't I!
Terry called me at work the day after our "break up".
"Valerie, why do you think we should just be friends? Did I do something?" He asked me. He didn't sound angry, like he had been the night before.
"No, Terry, you didn't do anything. I just feel....well...."(I hated having this conversation! Didn't he know I had made plans for the next forty years of my life, and he wasn't in them?) "I just feel smothered!" I finally blurted out. "You call me all the time, you leave notes and flowers on my car, and you've already said you loved me! I'm just not ready for that!" I said, with the fire in my voice that he loved.
There was silence.
"I feel like I've just been re-paid for all the girls that I stood up, or broke up with after leading them on." He said. He actually sounded...humble!
"Look, I wasn't leading you on. I really liked you, I still do, but we are so very different! I just don't think it will work. And besides, I'm leaving for college in about two months. There's no way it will work."
We said our goodbyes, and hung up.
Something inside of me said "You might be making a mistake, Valerie." But I ignored it. I knew I'd done the right thing. I'd been making a list of qualities to look for in a future mate since I was twelve years old. He wasn't measuring up to most of them.

During this time, I expected to see him "on the rebound" and get another girlfriend. Two girls made their cases to him in one way or another. I just held my head high and pretended that I was sure of myself.
He didn't sit with anyone else. He didn't even flirt with anyone else! Now, that was something! In the past, he would flash that toothy grin of his in all directions when eligible girls were around. But not now. Whenever I was around him at church, I could feel him watching me.
A week or so passed. I noticed he started dressing better! He actually stopped wearing jeans and western shirts to every church service. He bought regular dress shoes instead of always wearing cowboy boots (and nothing against cowboy boots, I was just pleased to see the variety!). I noticed he ignored the girls who tried to flirt with him. I noticed that now I was watching him. Oh dear.
I started to miss being able to talk to him; to laugh with him. I missed his making fun of me, now that he was good natured about it. I missed his confidence. Okay, I'll admit it, I also missed that "butterfly" feeling I had whenever he was around me. One day, he had me so nervous that after we talked at my car, I pulled away from him in first gear. He leaned back in my window just as I moved forward, and said "Hey, Val, you're in the wrong gear." He then tapped my car and walked away. I looked down, and yep, he was right. He gave me the feeling that if I fell, he'd be there to catch me. I missed that security.
Deep down, I wanted give him another chance. I wasn't sure if I should, though. I talked to my Mom. She didn't know what to do, either. Now, let me just say that this was a new thing to me. My Mom always knew what to do. She had always been able to advise me from some past experience of her own, or tell me some Scripture that would apply. This time, she had nothing. She was stumped! I quickly ran to my room to record this moment in my journal. Okay, I didn't do that! I was just checking to see if you were awake!
"Valerie," Mom said to me while we prepared supper one night, (Translation: Mom made supper while I poured my heart out to her. I think I set the table or something.)"I think you should go talk to Bro. Graham about it. He knows Terry, and his family. Bro. Graham will know what you should do."
"Mom, Bro. Graham will just tell me to do what you say to do! He knows you and Dad are wise people, and he wouldn't want to take a chance on giving me advice that you wouldn't agree with or something." I explained.
"Okay," Mom said, thoughtfully. "Then go to him and say 'My parents don't know what I should do. They told me to do what you say to do.'"
"Okay. I guess it can't hurt to try."
As soon as I could, I cornered Bro. Graham to see if I could get some counsel. He was always so gracious by allowing young, dumb nineteen year olds to corner him! I explained that I had broken it off with Terry,aka, Bumper, and that now I was having second thoughts. I asked him if he thought Terry was sincere in his feelings for me. Bro. Graham said yes, he felt sure that Terry really did care for me.
"What should I do now?" I said, rather desperately. "I ended things with him! My parents said to tell you that they didn't know how to advise me, so whatever you say, goes."
"Well," Bro. Graham said, "Why don't you just talk to him? Or write him a letter?"
"You don't think that would be forward?" I asked. (Remember, I had vowed to never be forward again!)
"No, I don't." He said.
"Okay! I will! I'll write him!" I left his office feeling as though a load had been lifted.

I went home and penned a note to Terry, explaining that I did want to date him, but things had to slow down. I apologized for being so wishy-washy.I told him that I just needed to withdraw for a while and think things through. Basically, I did everything except beg. I left it in his mailbox at the college.

He made a bee-line for me after church one night, after he'd read my note.
"Valerie. I got your note." He said to me. "Are you sure you want me, Terry Lee Basham, II?" He asked me boldly.
"Yes! I'm sure. I like you! I just need things to slow down for a bit." I told him.

He smiled at me and gave me a wink, but he never made any promises.

To be continued...